The Journey That Closed 2025 (Vision Quests, Psilocybin, and Everything In Between)

A Full Year Comes to a Close

As 2025 comes to a close and I start thinking about 2026, I’ve been reflecting on just how full this year has been. Full in the best way, and also full in the hard, stretching, sometimes exhausting way.

I just got back from a group psilocybin retreat in Oregon, and it felt like a really meaningful way to wrap up the year. I was genuinely excited going into it. I’d worked with one of the facilitators before, a good friend had done this retreat, and it felt like the right moment for something like this.

Why I Did this Psilocybin Journey (and What I Was Looking For)

I didn’t go in to this psilocybin journey obsessing over outcomes. I did know my intention, though: self-compassion and embodiment. Self-compassion has never been my strong suit, and learning how to be kinder to myself is something I’ve been actively working on, not always gracefully.

There were nine other women there, all showing up for their own reasons but with a shared desire for growth and connection.

I decided to take 35mg of psilocybin. Side note: I’m still getting used to thinking about mushrooms in milligrams since I’ve always worked with them measured in grams. What I learned pretty quickly is that 35mg is a significant amount of mushrooms.

Luckily, there was a smoothie place right next to the service center, which made that part surprisingly pleasant.

If I had to sum up the journey in two words, they’d be special and spectacular.

The energy in the room, the music, and the internal work came together in a way that felt really aligned for closing out the year. And 2025 was an epic year. Not always easy. Not always pretty. But big.

This was a year that included a ten-month vision quest, continued study toward becoming a licensed therapist, personal travel to Japan, and professional travel to Portland and Mexico to deepen my work as a psilocybin facilitator.

All of that happened alongside running my consulting business, parenting, maintaining friendships, and just… being a human.

This journey gave me space to actually feel and appreciate how far I’ve come in my 46 years. Not intellectually. In my body.

Working With Old Fears

I won’t go into all the details of the experience, but I will say I spent some time with old fears, especially around being too big or too loud.

What came through on the other side was a lot of compassion for myself and for what is, honestly, a pretty vibrant personality. There was some re-parenting. There were also clear insights about how I want to show up as a parent for my daughter.

It also became clear that there are a few loose ends I want to tie up as I head into 2026. Nothing dramatic. Just things that want to be finished so I can move forward cleanly.

One of the most meaningful parts was the group itself. We laughed, cried, celebrated, and mourned together. That kind of shared experience is powerful in a way that’s hard to explain unless you’ve been in it.

Stepping Into 2026

All in all, it was a beautiful way to close the year.

As I look ahead to 2026, I feel excited, grounded, and ready. I’m grateful to be doing this work, and I’m stepping into this next chapter present, awake, and fully alive. There is plenty of integration still to be done, but I will continue to bask in how far I've come.